Change

When I started this blog I wanted to post how I was going to change.

Well I do want to change...very badly...

So I got out my books, made my lists, had the great ideas....and then nothing.

Nothing!

What gives?  What happened?  Why didn't I change...I mean come on, I prayed...I read, I wrote my lists..I did everything right...

OH YEAH!

I forgot to do anything.
I didn't use the lists..
Or applied what I read in the books..
Or followed the Holy Spirit's prompting...

I think I was waiting for that magic pill to activate.
You know the one, where you swallow the pill and the pounds go away, and you become organized and wake up in the morning and start your day off right.
You have got to know the pill.  Well I was waiting for it...and it never came.

So I realized something.  I need to....



Remember this?  It's what Mike wanted us to do...and this is what I need to do.

Isn't the definition of insanity doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.  I mean I was waking up the same time, not using my Notebook, keeping the same schedule and spending all the money while eating hamburgers each day...and expecting to be caught up, have more money and losing weight.

I need to JUST DO IT!!!  I mean I have researched and read and prayed and haven't done anything with it.  It is like finding a cure and going to bed and getting up the next morning and still researching a cure.

I need to use the recipies
I need to count the calaries
I need to set the alarm
I need to record my money

Put some verbs to my sentences, use the determination and strength of mind that the Lord is giving me and ACT!

Help me to act dear Lord...Help me to do the action you have set me to do...Help me...I want to act dear Lord, I want to be better, to use the ideas you have inspired to learn.  You are my strength, the One I can lean on and gain inspiration from.  I love you Lord and want to honor you...and I know that I can with Your strength and love.

It's Not About Me

Wow!  You never know how much you get out of Worship and Praising God in church, until you can't.  I had to work yesterday, so I couldn't go to church and I didn't even realize I had lost my focus until I listened to a song posted by a blog I follow.

I started to listen and to praise God and all of a sudden, the Holy Spirit brought something to my mind by one line in the song.....

I live my life to shine Your Light
There is none besides you God

I was hit between the eyes with that one!

It is not about my hurt feelings, insecurities, finding a perfect house, having a successful program...
IT IS NOT ABOUT ME!

Satan tries so hard to take my focus off of the big picture (serving God) and focusing on things that rob me from joy (fears, insecurity, anger..).  The joy of serving my God, of living for Him, of putting Him first in my life.  Those things bring me true joy and every time my focus strays, I become discontent and full of anxiety and think lies of myself...

The thing is, why do I keep doing this?  Why can't I stay in the focus of the big picture?  Stay in the grace and love of my heavenly Father?  Why do I get swept up in the lies to the point that I can't see the forest from the trees? 

I am not sure why I do, but I am so glad that there is grace...grace from my family members, grace from my friends...

And the perfect grace from my precious Heavenly Father...my Loving Abba...the One who brings the songs and moments in life to bring me back to His wonderful peace and wonderful love.

Here is the song that touched my life...