Insecurity

Insecurity: adj. Inadequately guarded or protected; unsafe.

Insecurity. Just the sound of it makes me want to gag on a spoon! Haha! Remember back in high school when we said that?! Well that is how long I have been fighting it.

I mean, 'come on. Shouldn't I be better than this by now? Shouldn't I know that I have nothing to be insecure about? I have done all the self talk, read all the books, talked with everyone. Yet, ugly stupid thoughts would rear their ugly head! You know the ones:

"you know you weren't invited because they don't like you,"

" your kids disobeyed you because you haven't taught them good enough and they are going to grow up and be hellions"

Oh and my favorite, "you are so fat, your husband thinks you are ugly"

These are the thoughts that still come up, still haunt me at the ripe old age of 37.

Those thoughts are stupid angry thoughts...but what gets me into trouble is when I get dragged down and start BELIEVING the thoughts. That's when Satan has me at his best, that is when he convinces me that the dirty, ugly thoughts become my reality and my identity is wrapped into my insecurity.

And you know what? I hate it!!!! HATE IT!!!!

I mean you want to know what insecurity means?!

Inadequately guarded or protected; unsafe

Seriously! Am I Inadequately guarded? Um, no! Am I Inadequately protected? Um, no! Why you ask? Because of this promise:

You are my refuge and my shield; I have put my hope in your word. (Psalms 119:114 NIV84)

And this promise:

You give me your shield of victory, and your right hand sustains me; you stoop down to make me great. (Psalms 18:35 NIV84)

So according to the dictionary insecurity can only exist if I am Inadequately guarded...and since I am guarded, and protected and safe...THERE IS NO REASON FOR THE INSECURITY!

Now here is the stinky part:
The stupid, angry thoughts are going to come back. BUT (and this is a big but),

I can Overcome, not by me, but by the Holy Spirit in me.

And the stupid, angry thoughts can go away, because I am protected and safe and that is all I need!

Maximize Your Mornings: Hello Mornings

I am not a morning person!  Not. At. All.  I love to sleep, and for some reason the bed is the most comfortable right before you have to leave it!  The only thing is that I know how important it is to get up before my family.

My kids get out the door on time and without craziness...
I get to eat breakfast, have my devotional and get to have a little quiet to myself...
I get to plan my day and be the wife and mother I always want to be....

It is so important to get up early, so important to start my day off right...so important, but I never do it...I always give in to the warm bed, instead of doing the right thing...

So I joined this challenge, I will be joining other women who are committing to getting up and starting their day off right...all over the world, click here and join us...join us to commit to get up and start our days off right!

It's Not About Me

Wow!  You never know how much you get out of Worship and Praising God in church, until you can't.  I had to work yesterday, so I couldn't go to church and I didn't even realize I had lost my focus until I listened to a song posted by a blog I follow.

I started to listen and to praise God and all of a sudden, the Holy Spirit brought something to my mind by one line in the song.....

I live my life to shine Your Light
There is none besides you God

I was hit between the eyes with that one!

It is not about my hurt feelings, insecurities, finding a perfect house, having a successful program...
IT IS NOT ABOUT ME!

Satan tries so hard to take my focus off of the big picture (serving God) and focusing on things that rob me from joy (fears, insecurity, anger..).  The joy of serving my God, of living for Him, of putting Him first in my life.  Those things bring me true joy and every time my focus strays, I become discontent and full of anxiety and think lies of myself...

The thing is, why do I keep doing this?  Why can't I stay in the focus of the big picture?  Stay in the grace and love of my heavenly Father?  Why do I get swept up in the lies to the point that I can't see the forest from the trees? 

I am not sure why I do, but I am so glad that there is grace...grace from my family members, grace from my friends...

And the perfect grace from my precious Heavenly Father...my Loving Abba...the One who brings the songs and moments in life to bring me back to His wonderful peace and wonderful love.

Here is the song that touched my life...